August 26, 2014

If your friend with a lot of cats invites you to dinner, first buy them one of those novelty plates that says that "Food tastes better with a little cat fur."  If they laugh, don't eat there. 

July 15, 2014

Drivers - If you flip somebody off for some bone-headed driving mistake, you are doomed to make the same mistake within the next hour.

June 24, 2014

Buying "thinspiration" pants is a guarantee to pack on at least 5 pounds.

June 10, 2014

If you have close-by neighbors, something undesireable of theirs is going to come into your yard.

May 6, 2014

A perfectly green lawn with no dandelions is the sign of misspent priorities.

April 29, 2014

Instead of catering to their customers, Airlines now expect the customers to cater to them.

April 22, 2014

If your cell phone runs out of charge or is set to no ring, that is when you will misplace it.